24 missed calls under the lamp post

I watched the clock’s hand tilt with each passing second, hoping that when it points to 5, I’ll hear your voice from the other line but all I heard was the flickering of the lamp post.

As I keep dialing and waiting and calling..the sky turned from the shallow sea to navy blue. Still nothing.

I didn’t really know what I wanted to say but I knew that I had to call you.. I had to hear from you. Maybe even the slightest ‘hello’ would have sufficed. I used a different number but I just knew you would recognize me the moment you pick up. But you didn’t. And so you left me heart broken. You left me sitting at a bench with my phone clenched between my fingers pressed tightly onto my right here as if the need to hear your rusty voice was a hunger that could kill if not satisfied. Actually, it did kill me. But not like how a tiger devours its prey. This hunger..it killed me like I was this damsel tied to a railroad. I knew the train was gonna come any minute now…slowly…exposing me first of all my flaws then so surely runs over me.

Every blank interval between the phone ringing were like trains hitting me where it hurt the most.

But dear reader, I never really stopped. I kept pressing call til the 24th time. And finally I went numb.

Sometimes we have to admit, it’s just not meant to be.

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