Note: these are simply stories in my mind. some hypothetical..some real. judge if you must.
Dear person I used to love,
I have loved you too much for far too long that it’s impossible for me not to miss some fragments of you that used to be a daily routine for me to see. You have just left too much of yourself that I sometimes find it difficult to remember what my life used to be before you came. But here are some stuff that I guess I used to love that now I miss…
1. Your cats. I really hate cats. But the image of you with them is just so cute. Really. It is. The way you just cup them in your hands and play with them. Especially when they sneak in your room while were all cuddled up. It’s as if they miss you and they hate me for taking you away. But now, dear cats, no need to worry about me. I am gone and he is yours.
2. Your voice on the phone. Deep but assuring. Rusty but still caring. All the late night calls, I miss. Even the times when you wake me up so early in the morning just to hear my voice. But I can’t remember your voice anymore. I guess it’s just not for me.
3. Hugs from behind. So tight, sometimes a little too much. But it’s always the hugs the kept me coming back. The way you create such warmth feel so heaven-like is beautiful. I miss them. But I don’t need them. I’ve had better ones..gentle ones that didn’t crave for lust.
4. Waking up beside you. So far, it’s the best memory of you…of US. We were fighting and I was so tired, I slept on your bed. And when I woke up… pillows under my head, a blanket over my body..and by my side is YOU. It was the best feeling.. waking up and knowing that I will still love you no matter what happens. But that was before.
Sometimes, I wonder if you stare into the stars too..and think about all those things you miss about me. I do that sometimes. I remember..then I smile because I have no regrets. Thank you.